and so the story goes.

angstynancy-part deux
.

Its a Hi-Bye Situation.

sliprun

There's a place
between
waking and sleeping

Leaning over the side
Trailing fingertips
Feeling the water slip
Into the
quiet night

Catch me as I fall
Say you're here

it's
all
over
now

Speaking to the atmosphere
No one's here
and I fall into myself

This truth drives me
Into madness

I know I can stop the pain
If I will it all away

I can feel
the
night beginning.

Piecing
every thought
together

Find the words
to make me better.

If I only knew how to pull myself apart.

Should it hurt
Should I feel
like I do

Should I
lock
the last
open door

My ghosts are gaining on me.

We're leaving
here tonight

There's no need to tell anyone

They'd only hold us down

So by the morning light
We'll be half way to anywhere

Where love is more than just your name


I have dreamt
of
a place for
you and I
where
No one
knows
who we are

All I want is to give my life only to you

I've dreamt so long I cannot dream anymore
Let's run away, I'll take you there

shadow.

rapid thumping
over pumping
head banging
lips biting
wrapped
curled
close

vixen.

chance.

Always say in this cynical thing
Hold me
No ball and chain
I risk my reputation
Just to get more
You always have the reservation
Come lay down beside me.

These amaranth feelings
A cognitive state
Need the love object
To reciprocate

To never speak of it
Or hear the music of it
We’ll play a symphony
In my wildest dreams

Got to keep it all inside
Got to keep it locked behind a
Golden wall of silence
You see I have my pride
And I won’t be telling him
Anytime soon
Too afraid to say it
I wouldn’t want to embarrass myself
Telling everybody the truth

It's all borrowed time
And you always said I would regret it
If I grew up too fast
But my heart is strong and true
I'm doing fine
The things that you said
I won't forget them
I'll do as you ask
And always play fair for you

Each man must stand alone
Walk alone along a road
Of his own making
Can’t turn your back
On your particular ending

gotta love lykke li.

when right is wrong.

its now
time
when
it becomes a crime
to let your
heart
beat.

to let
your mind
think.

to feel.

but it's all
still fine.

i guess.
everything
needs
getting
used to.

and it
moves on.

stay.

go
throw
it away
like it's
nothing.

pour it
down
the sink
like it's
spoilt
milk.

trash it
like
old news.

go throw
it
away.
cuz it
doesnt
mean
anything
to you.

fuck it.
hurt it.
it hurts.
trash it
u name
it.
it doesnt
have
any life.

fuck you.
i'll
leave you.
trash you.
throw you.
trash you.

why should
i savage you
when
you
won't
want to
savage me.

clap hands.
you disgust
me.
clap hands.

calm down.

une fois deux.

sing rhymes
of
make-believe
green
pastures
and blue skies.


pretty crimson
ribbons tied
tongues.

then those
dirty little things
creep in the shadows
of filthy minds.

strumming melody
of butchered
hands.

rush and gush.
perspire.

through
those lips
an eerie tune
escapes.

i need more
parts.
dispose the
expired.

honestly
this is
not about
you.

wake up
to screeching
life.

its the beat of the
flesh
where
lust and sluts
become
rivals.

love and dick
become
companions.

embrace
the murk
that
conceals
and heals.

tell me where it hurts.

this is a story
of a boy
obsessed.



he says

i did it for you.
wouldn't do it
if not for you.

you.

blink at your flaws.

me.

me being all that i am.
always
hoping.
wishing.
hopeless romantic.
dancing with myself.

i need that motivation.
or maybe
a little tenderness.

my negativity displeases
i want u to embrace it.
let me in.

obsession.
like a parasite
infect the heart.

stubborn heart
that i thought
has grown cold.

but it's been
invigorated
and the feeling's
back.

that weak me

that idolizes
that drowns
himself
into
you.

and it is scary.

cuz i am so
easy.

cuz you
are not easy.

but u could
give it a shot.

i wonder
why
can't you
and you
and you
just try
just a little bit.

pour your misery down on me.

hold
tie
screw.

sit there, just shut up.

don't worry
we'll be alright.

like a black hole
you suck me in.

words creep silently.
sounds of stagnent
thoughts.
decaying confusion
held in sweaty hands.

deep purple eyes
has got me hypnotised.

married to the fantasy
of a drowned world
hidden in ur pants.

together
we sink.

sharing breaths
as the
concrete dries.


lips
touch
flew.

ending start.

confined in space
of lost voices

reach the distance
muted choices

sing to me
in the echoes

wane like the moon
dissappear
in the light

spilling
overflowing

fear
its clear

spit it out.
let it bleed.

bloodsport.

four by four.

take a trip
downtown

skipped a beat
bitten lips

twisted affair
randomized desire

sound of stagnent air

missed steps
engaging stares
sway to moving lights

i want to taste your skin

unspoken
to keep the bars intact

a predictable unprepared
disease of the mind

take care of it
desert the obvious
enliven the oblivious.

cheap thrills
overload

dilluted scenes
obscene reality.

misdirected
misinterpreted
misconsumed
perception
suspense.

rely on what
u get high on.

dream/run/drown/paralyze.

fly me to the moon.

a chest of sentimental
scribblings;

a hundred paper pieces
inscribed with ur name.
unsent postcards.
polaroids of objects
you desire;
i'm forced to love.

and endless run
uphill
downhill
and tripping and stuck in between.

the power of faux reality.
like a remedy
for cold hands
and blurry vision.

do u want to get in.
do u wanna get out.

i stare at you
to make you
stare at me.

let's get together
dance in the shadows.
let's hum together
goodbye, hello.

tu m'intrigues.

the means of hard to please
over under all's a tease
tried and tested
leave it dont miss it

kiss to kill
kill to kiss
they say don't mess
with the wicked

be blessed with the wretched.

spell it out one by one
lay and swing
on hanging webs

starful eyes

another shocking surprise
another compromise
another reprise

leave it to the experts
twist and turn it
till the moon
goes to sleep.

trembling torture
hasteful fervor.

-fisheyed-

the bitch stole my lollipop.

love will tear us apart.

reversed. perversed.

cat's got my tongue.

because u said so.

electric.

come near.
closer.
may bite but
it's gonna be nice.

don't believe the sight.
what that little twisted
heart says.

no rules apply.

it's not so hard.
don't get soft.

savour this raw flesh.
pick a flavor.
swallow.

trash yesterday.
do it
it's easy
i promise.

turn on the disco lights.

tomorrow sparks.

you're out.

fill me up
with bits of wondrous
insanity
technicolor
dreamscape
cherry flavored gummy bears
falling from
wax crayon clouds.

shalala
lalalala
lalalala.

painted faces
different names
two hearts
conversed taste.

say 'ah'
open up.
do this
do that
say no
assent.


come what may?
toodles doll.
don't explain.
hide and seek.

laughter is
the best
amnestic
anaesthetic.

don't say goodbye.
prevail chances
dysphoric life sentence.


you looked so fine.

a cause des garçons.

hole-punched extravaganza.
eye popping
perfervid imaginings.
deleterious lust.

the visage
of sheer fabrication.

a welcome note
from mister gloom.
eye patched monsters.

sway with me.
do the twist.

high tension.
is this forever and ever.

tid-bits.

rock the shocker.

three months was short.
a whole load of shit and sweets
that makes the ending sentimental.

child's play.

humming monotony
wood plastic hollow.
clacking pieces.
happy sad faces.

twinkle twinkle
insatiable.

razzle dazzle
the look in ur eyes.
broken whispers.

shambled dreams.
voracious blood thirst.

hide, kept, trapped.
lost.forgotten.
replaced.displaced.

compulsive convulsions.

green eyed
impulsified
unjustified
unsatisfied


don't pry
don't lie
don't sigh
don't cry


misvisioned
soulless eyes
mispredicted
blocked out
reprise


undue sentiments
sucking dry
timelessness
devours from within


an empty core
unabided.
a disembodied lore.

fuckin stop this at once.
thrills that kills.

fuckin stop this at once.
blood sucking musings.

fuckin stop this at once.
tortured fingertips.

fuckin stop this at once.
and for all.
absinthe drenched novels.

the limit to enough.

lowest depths
darkest shadows

a need to remain.
a need to replace.
a need to reform.
a need to rejuvenate.

let not scars restrain.

sink in.
breathe in.
soak in.
feel a sense of victory.
everything makes sense.
even the most senseless.
or unfair
or painful.

sink in.
breathe in.
soak in.

enough weeping
the world is yours.

still seconds.

HUSH.

the bent.

carbs craving sweetsome glazed tenderness

sun-kissed lemon tingles.

welcome itch, goodbye itch.

glistening moist, meltdown.

stripped melodies, hallogramic tendencies.

lushful satisfaction
spiderweb trails, seabreeze peace.

reincarnate please.

destroy please.
the bent.

when the ticking clock prevail

the craziness.
the staring into blankness.

satisfy this hungriness.

spirited truths; prancing in the air.
made up words; the gazing stare.



need some sleep baby.
don't need another nightmare.

don't go down there.

suck and let go.

the anticipation.
the ironic disposition.

a yonder feeling made blur
squinted eyes.


yet another phantasmagorian.

a story.

Wille Sie noch lieben mich morgen.

closed my eyes.
monotonous convulsions of the insides.


uttered blood drenched symphonies.


thirst for sanity and all that's real.
sealed lips to avoid an overkill.


blink once for clarity.
blink twice, soon i'll see.

it could set me free.

Liebe kann beschädigen Ihre Gesundheit.

just breathe.


like matter combusting in air.
vibrating in the heat.

missing, crumbling, missing.
thinking, wishing, hoping.

the very essence of life
doesnt evolve something
unseen.

yearning
for release from this hindering
disguise.

let it fade as the earth spins faster.
it will do you good.
and make you wiser.


just believe.
just breathe.

wer wußte die Schmerz.

fisheye kembali lagi.

lomobsession.

makan hati.

the feeling of 'head in the clouds'
is making me way bit too comfortable
and then i float. float.

believe. breathe.

can't keep count the skipped beats.
ceaseless choking sighs.

fucked up reminiscence.


it's going to get better.
it will get better.

all good things come to an end.

how fucking true-precise- correct
is that sentence.





life goes on.
and THAT's fucking believable.

let me blow your mind.

needed a different place to spill open.

a place all virgin clean all prepared for
more vulgar rants

mental ejaculations
day-dream fantasies

delusional heart ridden
psychological
day to day tales
of trips on
pre-death's bliss.


welcome to angstynancy.

way out.

new new